Tag Archives: celebration

I will try to do better

I’m disappointed in myself today.

Yesterday I was up at Bethesda with Benjamin. We went to have lunch at the Cheesecake Factory as a treat. I put money in the meter, we went inside and had a lovely lunch. After we pulled away and were heading home Ben said to me:

“I’m sad we didn’t give that man who was homeless any money.”

“What man?” I asked.

“The man, who was there at the meter.”

“Oh,” I said, “I didn’t see him.”

But then it struck me. I HAD seen him. I had seen a man sitting on a pile of stuff but didn’t take the time to really look at him and see him as a real someone; someone in need. I think I did realize he was homeless but I didn’t process it properly and realize I could do something.

I don’t know why, since I’m usually quite attuned to that sort of thing. Maybe it was because of the doctor’s appointment I’d had with my son, or because I’d scraped the car in the parking garage on the way out of the hospital, or because I have been so tired given all the running around or

…..really…WHO CARES WHY…I DIDN’T LOOK AT HIM and I didn’t SEE him.

But my son did.

I think that makes me feel worse in some ways. He saw a man who needed us and his mom didn’t do anything to help him.

I hope today that if I see someone in need I really do SEE him or her and don’t just think about myself.

Thank you son, for opening my eyes and reminding me to look and to see and to realize it is not just about me.

Today I will try to do better.


Christmas Somehows

There was so much excitement. 

From the first eyes that popped open at 0315 this morning, to the last little heads hitting the pillow at 8:43 in the evening; everything was flying.  Christmas wishes, Christmas I love yous, Christmas paper and Christmas joy.  What had taken at least 30 days to build up exploded at 6:55 in the morning.  Four little boys were allowed to burst down the stairs after being sent back to their rooms three different times throughout the night, two different boys each time creeping into mom and dad, asking “Can we go down now?”.  After patiently waiting for the camera to be ready, the lights to be plugged in, Grandpa to be awakened and mom and dad to get positioned. Finally, after all of that, Santa was allowed to fill the house with cheers and laughter and joy. 

There were trucks, cars, Game boy games, new pajamas; boys sharing, laughing, fighting, tugging, and screaming. ‘There were toys that needed one more battery than was found and toys that needed boy power when the boys power was long exhausted. Somehow there was dinner.  A dinner at the table with little boys using crystal glasses, charger plates and cloth napkins. Somehow little boys forgot about presents for just a moment and gave prayers of thanks and prayers of peace and toasts to dad and mom.

Somehow food was served and eaten and boys practiced putting their hands on their laps, eating without elbows on the table, holding chairs for ladies, and complimenting the hostess for a delicious dinner (even though the salad really was spinach and there were vegetables that required their attention).  Somehow little boys managed to settle down and have “quiet time”, hear that there would be no “treats” that night after a day of consuming Christmas cookies and candies and sodas, sweets much beyond their standard limits and way beyond their capabilities to digest. 

Somehow four little boys were carried to bed, some broken down with tears of exhaustion, excitement, and joy; trying to comprehend that after all those weeks of waiting somehow the day had slipped through their fingers. Somehow above the words of thanks being murmured on their lips, somehow, for just a moment, there was peace on earth, a moment of grace; where parents knew for sure that in the world there were at least four boys that were as happy as they would ever be in their lives.

Merry Christmas and Good Night.