Kid Speak

For posterity: odd words and phrases: and definitions of those words/phrases, used routinely in the Flett household.

1. Goopies. (Pronounced: goo peas), n.

 Those things you clean out from the inside and outside corners of your eyes in the morning or after being out at the baseball fields.

Common Usage

“Okay boys; clean your goopies.”

2. No Poke Zone. (Pronounced: no po oh ke z oh n eh) n.

That effect created by crossing your arms over your chest; flattening out your hands and holding them in Cleopatra fashion over the portion of your shoulder just above your armpit.

3. Worst Poke Ever (pronounced: wurst po oh ke eh ver) n.

The execution of a successful poke in the area described above when said area is not protected by the successful execution of the “no poke zone”.

Common Usage

Pokee after being poked:

“Oh no, that was the “worst poke ever”.

4. Coner (pronounced: ko ner) n.

 The act of shaping your hand in an “O” shape and successfully placing that “O” on the target’s chin.

5. No Cone Zone (pronounced: no kone z oh n eh) n.

Target of incoming coner is successful at shaping their thumb and pointer in an “L” shape (think the “loser sign”) and placing that “L” directly in front of the chin, with the thumb running under the chin, to stop any incoming coner assaults.

6. No Cone, No Poke Zone: (common pronunciation) v. n.

The simultaneous execution of a no cone zone and a no poke zone. Think Cleopatra with her arms folded over her chest and her head turned with her chin and resting in the “L” shape of her left hand which is in turn resting on her chest just above the armpit.

7. Best Bite in the Universe. (Common pronunciation) n.

The bite of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that is formed at the “neck” of two slices of bread where the crust doubles around on itself near the top. This is especially significant if the sandwich is made with white bread (which mommy hardly ever buys).

Common Usage

Boy about to take a bite yells to his brothers:

“Best bite in the universe.”

 To wit all of the boys say:


8. The Brothers: (common pronunciation) plural noun.

Term used by any one brother in search of any one or more brothers in the family.

Common Usage

“Mom. Where’s the brothers?”

9. Fix it: (figs iht) n.

An obsessive need to rectify something you know isn’t right.

Common examples include but are not limited to:

  • Needing to crack all of your knuckles after one accidentally cracks


  •  The compelling act of cleaning out aforementioned goopies when they are brought up.


  • Not being able to sleep unless the bottoms of the sheets are tucked in. 


  • Needing to feel pressure at the ends of your fingers. 


  •  Repeatedly restarting your prayers with mom till you both say your parts perfectly.

 10.  “Roughed Up” (pronunciation: ruffed up) adj.

Something that is not right and should be corrected as in “messed up.”

Common Usage

“That’s roughed up!”

This is really a Flett Family experiment.  We want to see if this new term will catch on in America and spread around the United States.  Kind of how “turkey” or “phat” must have gotten started.  Keep an ear out.

11. Fluffer Nutter: (common pronunciation) v.

The act performed with the brothers after they are tucked in, where mother (it must be the mother) lifts the cover or covers and fluffs them down on the occupant of the bed. It is best if the occupant is compelled to “pose” their legs while the blanket is in the air.


Well I feel tons better now that I’ve gotten those written down for the official record. I’d been so worried that I’d forget some of the fun things we do that I was having “fix its”.

Parenting Tip of the Day:

Lighten up and be goofy with your kids. The boys recently had their spring photos taken at school. I told them they could do funny faces in the photo. So there they were, dressed up and making goofy faces to the photographer for their “official” spring photo. A mom came out of the room where the photos were being taken laughing and saw me waiting with the next class to go in.

“Did you tell them they could do that?” she asked me.

 I smiled and nodded.

“You know” she said, “I had my son in tears this morning because we couldn’t get his hair just right. I really need to lighten up.”

“Well,”  I thought to myself

“light sure is easier to carry.”


8 responses to “Kid Speak

  1. Love the list. I am glad that I am not the only one obsessed about the sheets being tucked in at the bottom of the bed.

    I agree with the tip. Tooters and I always managed to find something funny to laugh at everyday. I think that the best sound in the world right now is her little giggles.

  2. What a good idea to give them expressions they can use now. I like “That’s roughed up” it’s a good one.

  3. Ohhhhh-lucky you Davis. Enjoy–I’m drooling a little bit just thinking about it.

  4. These are funny. In my family growing up, we used to say, “I’ve got sleep in my eyes” for the goop… then we heard another family call them “eye boogers.” Guess which one we used. 🙂

    Our family is adding to its collection of “family-isms”, but our kids are still young, so we don’t have quite the list you’ve got.

    • Cool!–keep the list–otherwise you’ll forget and lose them. One of the best gifts I got as a new mom was a little yellow spiral called my tot’s tales. I just touched it a second ago cause I keep it handy.
      Hmmm-don’t think I’ll be using eye boogers. That really will catch on!

  5. I especially liked the best bite in the universe. I’ve PB for lunch today and I can’t wait for that one.

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